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Note: This is my opinion on what you should do when you find out you are pregnant. It is how I feel, and I feel strongly about it. I know others will either agree or disagree, and that is fine, but it doesn’t change my experiences or my thoughts. So please be courteous about what you comment.
The second you find out you are pregnant, a lot of things can run through your mind.
“We are going to be parents!”
“Oh my gosh, we are going to be parents!”
“We are going to have a CHILD.”
“I am going to get so huge.”
“It’s going to cost so much money.”
“I’ve never diapered a baby before.”
“But we are going to be parents!”
“What in the world do we do now???”
Don’t worry! I am here to tell you some helpful tips and things to do once you find out you are pregnant! I am on my second pregnancy, and during the first, I was just so full of excitement that I didn’t think about some of these things. But now that I am in the middle of my second pregnancy, I have realized that there are several things that you will want to do as soon as you find out you are pregnant, and then throughout pregnancy.
1. Don’t tell people until you are past the first trimester. I think family is okay to tell, but it can be smart not to tell the whole world until after the first trimester is over. I know it can be incredibly hard not to tell your friends as soon as you find out you are pregnant, but try not to post it to Facebook just yet. One of my biggest fears is having to go back and tell people that something has happened and you have had a miscarriage. The baby is most vulnerable during the first 12 weeks you are pregnant, and after the first trimester, the chance of a miscarriage drops dramatically (down to 10% of all known pregnancies). So just to be safe, try your hardest to wait until you are 13 weeks pregnant before you spread the glorious news. If you want to read more about why I think you should wait, you can read this post about why I wait until the second trimester to tell people I’m pregnant.
2. Document your pregnancy. One of the best ways to do this is to use a pregnancy journal. There are tons of cute ones on Amazon
3. Take lots of pictures. This sort of goes along with documenting your pregnancy, but it is really fun to take lots of pictures. You can do weekly pictures or monthly pictures. With Little J and this pregnancy, I have been taking a picture (or trying to) every two or three weeks. It’s fun to see how you grow, and you can even get creative with a little sign or use your computer to put in text. This also makes it so you can compare what you looked like with multiple pregnancies, and you can see how much sooner and bigger you are the second time around! And get Dad and other kids involved, too. There are lots of cute pictures I have seen on Pinterest with kids kissing their mom’s belly or with couple maternity shoots. Just take lots of pictures!
4. Check your medications to see if you can still take them. I had some allergy medications that I was taking before I got pregnant with Little J and after my first appointment, my doctor recommended not taking them anymore. Some things like ibuprofen shouldn’t be taken during pregnancy either, so you may want to consider switching to Tylenol for any headaches or cramps that get severe. There are other things that you shouldn’t take during pregnancy, too, so check with your doctor in your first prenatal visit to find out what you need to be careful of. It’s much better to be safe than sorry!
5. Take a before picture. With my first pregnancy, I took a “one month” picture as soon as we found out we were having a baby. Then with this pregnancy, I took a “five week” picture. It was fun to see how much different I looked, and then to compare the before picture with a picture from right before Little J was born and then after I had lost the weight. “That will make you feel bad,” you say. No. Trust me. It will be fun to compare, and in my case, it actually helped motivate me to lose the weight once baby was born. And while not everyone may think this is funny, it was crazy to see where I had gained that 50 pounds. With my daughter, I only gained 35 pounds, and you can tell in the pictures below that most of the weight gain was in my belly and not in my face and butt like it was the first time!
6. Use lotion early and everywhere. During my first pregnancy, my skin decided that it was going to have stretch marks all over. And I mean all over. My chest, my thighs, my butt, and yes, my stomach. So as soon as I started seeing those little lines I started slathering on Palmer’s Cocoa Butter
7. Find a workout plan and stick to it. Not only is it important to workout when you aren’t pregnant, it is important to stay healthy and workout while you are pregnant! Your body is going through a lot of changes and you want to keep it healthy. When I was pregnant the first time I used the stretches and exercises in the What to Expect When You’re Expecting
8. Shop around for maternity clothes. I have found that my favorite places to buy maternity clothes are Target and Old Navy. They have cute clothes other places, too, but Target and Old Navy are both affordable and cute. You don’t want to spend a lot of money on maternity clothes because you don’t get to wear them all the time. But at the same time, you still want to look cute and show off that bump. The Liz Lange line at Target is my favorite for maternity clothes. I pretty much want all of their dresses, and the tops I got from there are my favorite of all my maternity shirts. Pants are a little bit harder, because they usually just come in small, medium, or large and I have yet to find ones that are long enough. I’ve had success at Old Navy, but only because I was able to order long ones. Try on a bunch and if you still can’t find any that are perfect, just remember that you only have to wear them for a few months. If you want to know about more places, check out my post Best Places to Shop for Maternity Clothes (In Store and Online!).
9. Start taking a prenatal vitamin. You may already be taking one if you were trying to get pregnant, but if you aren’t, start now. They are jam-packed with lots of good things your baby needs to get a head start on life. Folic acid, iron, and calcium are especially important. Prenatal vitamins are not only important for your baby, but they are important for you since your baby is zapping up all those vitamins that you would normally get. So you need extra, and that is where a prenatal vitamin comes in. So as soon as you find out you are pregnant, get some! And you can even buy giant bottles that will last all of pregnancy, so that is fantastic. And if taking a pill isn’t your thing, now they have gummy vitamins that I’m assuming are delicious and a lot easier to take. So you really have no excuse to get your baby those extra good vitamins and minerals they need while growing!
10. Research baby products. Especially the big things like strollers, car seats, and cribs. One of my favorite places to look (not necessarily buy) is Amazon.com. They have such a wide selection of items, and they have tons of great, helpful reviews for each product. You should also ask any young moms who have recently bought things and see what they like and don’t like. And once you do have a few in mind that you feel good about, try and see them in person at the store. I mean really, you have nine months to find these things and you obviously want the best for your child. And the second time around you will already have a lot of the bigger things and won’t have to look again (plus, you won’t have time). You can read about the best baby products we ever purchased here and the best list of baby essentials here.
11. Make a list of what to do before and after your baby is born. This was super helpful to me because it helped me feel more prepared before Little J was born, and then I knew exactly what I needed to do after he was born. Lucky for you, I have compiled two such lists and they are some of my most popular posts. They are the things that I did, and they were so helpful. I’m sure I will add to them when the time comes for this pregnancy, but for now, check them out so you can be prepared (did anyone else just sing that like Scar from “The Lion King?”). There is a list of “25 Things to Do Before Your Baby is Born” and “15 Things to Do After Your Baby is Born.” Trust me, a lot of good info there. And you don’t have to use all of it, but at least add some of them to your lists!
13. Download an app to follow along. I personally love the ones where each week they tell you how big your baby is in terms of fruit. My two favorites from my two pregnancies have been the “What To Expect Pregnancy” app and the “Baby Bump Pregnancy Free” app. Right now I am using the “What To Expect Pregnancy” one and it is really nice because you have access to daily tips, weekly updates, and discussion boards for people who are having babies in the same month as you. And it’s exciting to have it right there on your phone every week so you don’t have to go looking it up. Even if you aren’t big on reading books at least you get some tips this way!
14. Read as much as you can. When I was pregnant with Little J I pretty much read everything I could get my hands on about babies and pregnancy. I read “What to Expect When You’re Expecting
So congratulations on being pregnant, and don’t worry! You have eight months (depending on when you are reading this) to prepare for your new little bundle of joy. Yes, it can be scary to find out you are pregnant, but being a parent is the best (especially being a mom!) so just get excited and don’t worry. Good luck!!
Thank you Chelsea. It's been a difficult but wonderful period. I pray someday I will get to take the journey into motherhood as well.
I hope you do, too! We had a hard time getting pregnant (http://www.lifewithmylittles.com/2014/02/making-baby-is-hardest-thing-i-have.html)” target=”_blank”> ” target=”_blank”>(http://www.lifewithmylittles.com/2014/02/making-baby-is-hardest-thing-i-have.html) so I sympathize with others who do, too. Good luck! Don't give up!
I have had two full-term pregnancies, and two miscarriages, and just found out I am pregnant again, and we still told friends and family right away. If something goes wrong, those are the people who will walk through it and be sad with us.
With my first pregnancy we waited “because the chance of miscarriage goes down after the first trimester”. Well we lost our baby at 16 weeks so we have a whole different view now! With this pregnancy we have already told our family and a few friends. They all went through our grief with us last time and I need their love and support more than ever now.
I’m so sorry. Yes it goes down, but it still happens. Everybody can make their own choice and I’m glad you know what is best for you! I hope baby is healthy!
I understand that. Personally though, I would only want very close friends and immediate family knowing. I just think people should think before they immediately post it to Facebook!
I like how you articulated your opinion in this comment. I was prepared to disagree (respectfully) with your first point in the article, but I can agree with the encouragement to THINK about it before posting. I personally have chosen to share early on every time. I’m blessed to not have lost a baby, but I would still want to acknowledge the life, as well as what we’d be going through, if something did happen. My best friend is just the opposite and told almost no one until after the first trimester of each of her pregnancies. So again, I like how you articulated it in the comment more than the article. People may choose differently, but your encouragement to think before sharing on social media is good advice!
Thanks, Angie!!
Are those pants you're wearing in the before and after pic a pair of VS PINK sweatpants with a pink heart and silver peace sign?! I have those, if so! And you look about my size so it's cool to see you in a pair of pants fitting the same way I fit then now and give me an idea of how I'm going to look at the end of pregnancy. Lol
Haha yes! They were nice and baggy in the beginning and not as baggy towards the end. I definitely filled them out more, but that's what happens when you gain 50 pounds!
If you are like me and too lazy to actually do a journal or make a shutterfly book of your pregnancy, there's an easier option! The Belly Book is a super cute pregnancy journal that gives you prompts as well as some blank journaling pages, and includes spots for all your belly pics and ultrasound pics. My sister in law gave it to me early on, and I love it!
I was really disappointed in the What To Expect app. As soon as I made an account, I started getting a ton of junk email from third party advertisers. There is no way to delete your account or et off those mailing lists other than to request to be removed from every single one.
I completely agree, Serena!
Oh sweet! I have never heard of that before. I will have to look into it for my next baby! Thanks for the tip, Jacy!
Really? That's too bad. I signed up two years ago and never had problems with that. I don't remember but I wonder if there is a little box that you have to check so you don't get things like that.
Cute article. Just be warned that cocoa butter was discouraged by my drs because of the caffeine. But there are plenty of other great, caffeine free moisturizers! 🙂
Those two apps are amazing! They have been right on point with 99.9% of everything I've been experiencing 🙂
Really? I haven't heard that. I am just using regular lotion from Bath and Body Works this time and I am just now starting to see stretch marks at 32 weeks!
It's nice to know that even though those things are all weird to you, they are normal for pregnancy!!
i love your post!
Thanks! I hope they come in handy!
I disagree with #1. Someone might not want to mourn the loss of their child alone and if you feel like it, life should be celebrated right from the start, as soon as you feel ready to. You can loose your baby at any time despite statistics…
Great tips! The only one that I don’t like is the first one. Miscarriages are very emotionally trying for women and our American culture teaches that it is inappropriate for women to mourn for their early miscarriage publically, when for many it is just as depressing as a miscarriage later on. Depression is only heightened by the idea that a woman shouldn’t go public with it. The message sent is her grief is silly because she is “just in her first trimester.” It is a very personal decision and Frankly our culture is too quick to pressure pregnant mom’s into silence during the first trimester. I don’t think there is anything wrong with the decision to not share until the 12th week, but I do think encouraging others to do the same is not the best idea. Many women need the public to know their loss so that people respect their hard emotions rather than writing it off as “she’s sure grumpy today!”
That’s fine if you disagree with the first one. I know that miscarriages are tough. I haven’t personally experienced one, but I have many friends who have. In fact, I have written a post about how to help someone who has had a miscarriage. I just think that I would rather have only my close friends and family know rather than people I barely know on Facebook, just in case. And I’m not going to change my opinion on it, even if people disagree. Thanks for your input!
I am totally understanding your first point. I lost our first baby at 13or14 weeks. I am the type of person that is completely open and fine with questions, so when I lost our baby, people would ask if it was ok if I talked about it with them, and I had no problem. Many of these were my aunts, or their friends. I told people right away as well, and I was glad I did, because that meant we could all be excited together for the time the baby was alive and well. With my next baby, I told family and friends right away, but once again kept it off facebook, and told my husband to do the same, until we had gotten farther along. We told those we met face to face, though. And I was able to request prayers and get a prayer chain going when I started bleeding with that baby. She is perfectly fine, alive, and well, and turning 9 years old in fall. I didn’t wait long with my son, or my other daughter (actually, with her, everyone was guessing already before we even took a test due to having so many symptoms). My last one, though, who is two now, we waited until 9 whole weeks to tell ANYONE because I wanted it to be a Father’s day surprise. That was so hard. But I had zero symptoms, so nobody even guessed! Anyway, point is, everyone will decide differently, but it is best to think about what you want to do before going ahead and doing so. My husband would tell the whole world and shout from the rooftops immediately upon showing him that test, but not me. I like to hold the little secret all to myself for a little while. I like to relish in it a bit. It is amazing.
I love what you said at the end there: “it is best to think about what you want to do before going ahead and doing so.” I 100% agree. Everyone is different, but you should consider how you would feel if something did happen. Thanks, Sabrina!
That's true. Personally, I just would rather have my family and close friends there with me instead of tons of people I don't know super well.
Thank you Chelsea. It helps to have a few tips.
You're so welcome!!! I hope they help!
Great advise! I also did everyone of these things with both of my pregnancies. ð
Thanks, Andrea! They made pregnancy so much easier for me!
Hey Chelsea, what prenatal vitamin do you take?
I just take whatever is cheapest at Walmart. I usually get big bottles so I don't have to buy them very often. I'm not picky!
How did you create your signature button??
I just designed it and then insert it into each post! Google will tell you how!
Thanks for sharing this post Chelsea. This is very informative and interesting article. I should try to remember this 14 things. I try to follow this tips, when I will pregnant. Now I am newly married.
Thank you, Larica!
I agree with this. My family and friends are really one in the same. My friends are family and my family are friends.
I guess it just depends on the person!
100% agree with #1. we found this out the hard way. We were 5 weeks pregnant and announced to the world (facebook, instagram, family, friends, acquaintances etc) we were so excited. And then we miscarried and had to say over and over and over and over again that we were no longer pregnant, that our baby had died. The second pregnancy we waited and we still miscarried and only our very close friends and family knew. Our last pregnancy was successful and we didn't announce until 15 weeks.
Thank you so much for agreeing! You phrased perfectly why I don't recommend sharing with the world until you are in the second trimester!
I agree, I waited all of a week to tell my close friends and family and I'm glad I did. At week fourteen (second trimester) I started bleeding. A lot. So many difficult things happen when you are pregnant (at any point) and having family and friends to talk to makes it easier.
I get that, but I personally would only want my family and very close friends to know and be there with me for that.
It is an incredibly personal choice whether you want to tell people via Facebook or keep it quiet until your 12 weeks +. There is no right or wrong way and I think very much reflects your personality. I am glad I told the people I did with my first pregnancy because I needed their support greatly when I miscarried. I honestly think the more support and discussion regarding miscarriages that takes place is a very positive thing because it can be a very lonely and frightening time. Sadly I think the way the page is organised and written comes across as listing advice statements and not opinions . Keeping it to yourself can be a wonderful thing also …time for you to reflect …and celebrate your pregnancy privately but it depends on what you need at that time. Enjoy telling people when you're ready in whichever form you chose to do so.
Yes, it is my advice and my opinion. Yes, it depends on the person, but I strongly suggest waiting until you are past the first trimester. Yes, some people might want extra support from lots of people if they do end up miscarrying, but personally, I would hate to be reminded of it every time someone asked me how my pregnancy was going, and if I had announced it on Facebook rather than just to a few close friends, that is a lot more likely to happen. It's never fun to give good news and then rescind it, but I think it would be so much worse to have to do that on Facebook to people you don't really care about.
I just had my baby girl 3 Months ago and I documented EVERYTHING she’s my first of course and life couldn’t be more exciting. I’ve used Shutterfly to create books, prints, reusable bags etc. and I love it. This article was great. I’ll be doing the same if my husband and I decide on baby #2
You’ll be so glad you documented everything! Thanks and good luck if you have another one!
Thank you so much for this article. I just found out I was pregnant only 3 days ago and my fiancé and I are pretty clueless and scared.. It helps to read a little to understand what to expect and also advice from someone who has been there before. Thank you!!
Congratulations! That’s so exciting! It is a little scary, but it’s so much fun, too. I hope that everything goes well for you guys! Congrats!
Thanks!!! It’s really helpful as I just found out and super scared. But this steps will help me to put my mind at ease 🙂
Don’t be scared! Pregnancy is amazing (and crazy and uncomfortable but also the best!). And it’s SO WORTH it in the end!! Congrats!
Wonderful info! I would also include this: buy yourself a little gift! you have to get The Daily Soul Sessions for the Pregnant Mama book! It’s on Amazon, it’s amazing! It literally saved me during my pregnancy. There are 280 short soul sessions. It’s not religious, just heart warming and spiritual to help you connect with yourself and your creativity and your baby each day. You’ll love it!!
That’s a great suggestion! I haven’t heard of that book before, but I’ll have to check it out!
Wow thanks Chelsea ur tips really helped…though am young l knoe am gonna use them one day…am only 17 but thank you biggy
You’re welcome! You can definitely wait a while before you use these tips!!
tnx am two months and it’s my first ur tips was helpful and great
Good luck!