Comments on: How to Handle Visitors After Birth

By: Chelsea Johnson

Chelsea Johnson — Tue, 09 Apr 2019 18:29:02 +0000

In reply to Sabra Casey. Do what works for you! Seriously, it might hurt feelings at first but if it helps you make the transition easier, go for it!

By: Sabra Casey

Sabra Casey — Tue, 02 Apr 2019 21:19:18 +0000

Thank you so much for sharing! I’m seriously considering no visitors for baby #2 and I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels like this. Thanks again!

By: Chelsea Johnson

Chelsea Johnson — Tue, 27 Nov 2018 19:36:14 +0000

In reply to Kelly. That is such a complicated situation. I'm sorry, Kelly. I would maybe try and compromise with him and have her come on day three or four? I hope that whatever you guys decide works out! Good luck with your sweet baby!

By: Kelly

Kelly — Mon, 26 Nov 2018 02:56:50 +0000

So how do you deal when your husband disagrees and insists that his mother be there day one? I, however, do want MY mother in the room with me, I have an auto immune disease and had a miscarriage last year which has complicated the pregnancy. Having my mother there is comforting and she knows how to calm me and reassure me better than anyone, including my husband who isn’t the best with his words. This is my first child and will be my only child due to medical reasons and high risk pregnancy. While I know this will be special for my husband as well this is his fourth child. I don’t know how to move forward other than to cave in and allow his mother to be there day one even though I know it will be uncomfortable for me.

By: Chelsea Johnson

Chelsea Johnson — Mon, 12 Nov 2018 20:17:51 +0000

In reply to Nazish haq. Yikes! That sounds insane! Good thing you learned for next time!

By: Nazish haq

Nazish haq — Sun, 11 Nov 2018 18:08:04 +0000

In reply to EP91. I felt the same way when I had guests. We had 6 different families in less than a month. It was excessive. Not having guests for like a month next time!

By: Chelsea Johnson

Chelsea Johnson — Wed, 26 Sep 2018 18:10:07 +0000

In reply to EP91. Thank you for sharing your experience! I'm so sorry you went through that, and even though you learned this the hard way, I'm glad you know now and can share it!

By: EP91

EP91 — Wed, 26 Sep 2018 09:46:58 +0000

I wish to goodness I had read this before I had my baby. Had a traumatic birth, baby was fine but I was exhausted and sore I had my friends sister and mother stop by the hospital that day unannounced which was exhausting and now when I look back, a bit uncalled for. Didn’t want to appear rude, so put on a brave face.

We got home after a very difficult first night with no sleep. Brother in law calls with his new wife. They said they wouldn’t stay long. We got pizza, baby slept throughout, after 2 hours, when I desperately wanted to sleep, they produced a USB stick with a slideshow of their honeymoon photos, each with their own detailed commentary. I put on a brave face and roll out the obligatory oo’s and aa’s. An hour and a half later the baby wakes up fussing. They actually laughed and decided finally at that point to “leave us to it”.

We had visitors all monyh. It was exhausting, and because I’m quite private, I found it desperately hard to establish breastfeeding. One set of visitors which were not even relations stayed over 3 hours, and would only leave when her daughter got to hold the baby.

As generous as they were with gifts etc I felt, and on occasion still feel like such an ungrateful cow. But utimately it made my first month with my baby miserable and stressed out. It’s difficult to express to my family and friends as they were the ones with the good intentions, and can’t say much to my husband without coming across as the ungrateful cow that I have painted in my head. I feel a bit more confident in refusing visitors now (usually veiled in an excuse of having to go somehwere).

I am bookmarking this valuable piece of advice. I will act upon it should we be lucky to have another baby and recommend it to any family and friends having babies.